February 11, 2021

Relationship Bullseye

When thinking about a bullseye, what do you think of?  It has concentric circles, a red center, a black background.  It has a circle of black on the outside, then a circle of white, and these continue alternating until coming to the center red circle, the core, which is the bullseye.

If we think of categorizing our relationships into something that looks like a bullseye, what would we find?  If we start at the core, the center red circle, we see our Core People.  These are our closest relationships, the people that know us and we know them on a deep level because there is a high level of trust with each other.  We talk several times a week, possibly every day.  These people could be our family members and close friends.  They are most likely to be those that helped us through a difficult situation in which we had to survive.  This struggle may reflect disease, war, or any major difficulty in our lives. 

The next circle out from the bullseye would be our Close Friends.  We may talk to them once a week or something similar.  The circle after Close Friends would be our Extended Friends.  We may talk to our Extended Friends once a month or they may be those friends that you go a long time between talking but when you do, it is like you never missed a beat and picked up where you left off because you have a strong connection.

Moving to the next circle out, you would have your Tribe.  These are the people in your life that are moving in the same direction as you and may support the same type of lifestyle or organizations but there is not an intimate connection.

The next circle out would be the Crowd and then the final circle would be the Followers. The Followers are those that keep up with what is going on in your life but they may be loosely following you on social media or some other medium. 

In general, the outside layers may have many people in the categories but as you move toward the center, the amount of people in the categories reduces.  This is simply because of the time it takes to develop relationships but also because of the number of people you want to allow in your Core People circle. The numbers I like to use are 3, 12, 70, 500, more.  

I would like you to think about what those numbers mean and how it relates to Jesus.  Jesus had the 12 disciples, which were His Close Friends.  But He also had Peter, James, and John which were his Core People.  Jesus also sent out 70 people, 2 by 2 as disciples, which were His Tribe. Then, He had the crowds of 500 going place to place with Him. This was Jesus’s Crowd.  Finally, Jesus had His fans, or His Followers that were not part of His Tribe but they knew who He was and his activities. 

I hope the relationship bullseye will help you think through your relationships and allow for appropriate connection within the circles.  As you think through your relationships maybe there are some people that need to be moved in or out of a circle. Consider taking some time to pray about this and then be willing to do what God guides you to do. God told us that we were created to be in relationship with Him and others. So, making sure we have appropriate relationships is also important.

Coach Dale



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